The Hermitage
January 15th, 2020
The evening of my 82nd Birthday
The answer?
I pray i haven’t and never will.
One of my favorite stories:
Two friends met after not seeing each other for many years. One said to the other, “My, we’ve gotten old!” The second replied, “We all age.” The first responded, “No, some age, the rest of us just get older.”
The second is the slogan on a T-shirt given to me by my loving wife several years ago for my birthday...
“So far, this is the oldest I’ve ever been.”
We hadn’t heard the first story at the time, so I think she gave it in the spirit of ‘age.’ At least I choose to believe that now and wear it proudly.
As I mediated on the remarkable journey God has given me I was profoundly aware, “this is the day the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.”
As I was waking this morning I realized I was focusing on an undeserved tongue lashing I was given as a young LTJG by my squadron Skipper in front of all the pilots. I thought I’d processed it many years ago, forgiven him and myself, and forgotten it.
Since none of the old feelings were attached to the memory, I pondered, “Why is the Lord showing me this again?”
As the day joyfully progressed, I celebrated my birthday, received greetings from family scattered across the country, enjoyed a wonderful lunch, (made all more enriching by sharing it with some of the family,) and came home to two of the wonderful gifts with which God has graced me—Tito JāBear and The Hermitage Ranch.
Since the sun was over the yardarm, I poured myself a glass of Sherry (I’ve been watching a lot of Brit movies lately) fired up my pipe and...no, wait. I don’t smoke….
Well, anyway.
Sherry in hand I started reflecting on the 29,250 days the Lord has granted me.
Twenty nine thousand two hundred and fifty!
If that number doesn’t give you pause; nothing will. Try it for yourself. Google “how many days between (your birthday) and (the day you choose.)
29,249 of those days are gone and the 29,250th is almost in The Book. There is nothing I can change about them now except learn from those that held a lesson, rejoice in those that brought joy, and ask forgiveness for far too many that didn’t turn out like the Lord intended.
Tonight, as I put Tito in his bed and lie down in mine, I’ll pray the children’s prayer that comes to mind often these days:
Now I lay me down to sleep.
I pray you, Lord, my soul to keep.
If I should die before I wake,
I pray you, Lord, my soul to take.
Tomorrow morning, if I roll over, look out on the ‘back forty’ and sunrise is beginning to drive the shadows of the night away, I’ll greet the Lord with a joyful heart and start the 29,251st adventure of the incredible journey on which He has led me.
With His strength, the guidance of the Holy Spirit and wrapped in the love of the Father I’ll do my best to live out the mission I believe He has given me...
Living purposefully in The Sacrament of the Present Moment,* touching the lives of others with the presence of God bringing joy, healing and peace.
Epilogue
The memory? Just another one of those "ask for forgiveness" days. I think it was the Lord trying to show me that the past is the past...you can let go of hurt and pain if you're willing to let the Lord do the healing.
Till then,
Thanks for yonderin’ with me.
———————
*Jean-Pierre de Caussade, SJ